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Footballer has 664 million followers but his boring presence is a reminder of how reel-life destroys what it touches

Buy the backpack airlines hate. Fawn strangely at a child athlete. This TV presenter drank olive oil for a month and absolutely nothing happened. The streets (no actual streets involved) won’t forget (robots can’t forget) Paul Pogba (or equivalent coding).

Nineties dance hits. Ruben Amorim loyalists. Argue with fake fans over a fake photo of fake empty seats. Buy a backpack that hates you because you once thought about buying a backpack, and like a Hungarian grandmother it will never, ever forget and you will be punished.

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As always, feel free to email in with any thoughts, feelings, predictions, observations and all that jazz. What are your plans for the weekend? Where will you be watching the football? Let me know!

How the Premier League table looks as things stand…

• League to convene disciplinary panel at ‘earliest opportunity’

• Furious Boro want playoff opponents to be punished severely

Southampton have been charged with misconduct by the English Football League and will face an independent disciplinary commission set to be convened “at the earliest opportunity”.

Middlesbrough remain furious after catching a man they maintain belongs to Tonda Eckert’s backroom staff allegedly spying on a vital training session before Saturday’s Championship playoff semi-final first leg against Southampton at the Riverside Stadium.

Head coach Álvaro Arbeloa is facing the bitterest of ends as faint hopes are set to be extinguished by fiercest rivals

The vice-captain was taken to hospital for stitches having been laid out by his midfield partner. Another midfielder said he wouldn’t play any more; as if he was going to play anyway. The manager wasn’t asking for much, just that they didn’t swan out there as if wearing tuxedos, and that’s still asking too much. The centre-back hit the left-back. The winger fell out with the last coach. The captain fell out with this coach. And the superstar, already accused of not caring, swanning off to Sardinia, drives out of the training ground, past the cameras and away from the whole sorry mess, laughing his head off. Now here’s Barcelona.

You think things can’t get any worse but things can always get worse. The most painful week anyone could remember, maybe the biggest, most public crisis they have ever had, concludes with Real Madrid travelling to the Camp Nou on Sunday for the clásico. If they don’t win, and few believe they can given the football they play and the faultlines that run through their dressing room, they will watch Barcelona become champions with three games left, going down as the flames go higher and history is made. It would be the first time in 94 years a meeting of sport’s great rivals decides the title – only this title has long been decided, both cause and consequence of the turmoil Madrid are in.

The club chair said the move to the London Stadium showed they were not a ‘tinpot club’ but now relegation threat looms

When David Sullivan was pressed on why West Ham bothered to move to the London Stadium, the lack of substance to his argument offered a window into the club’s dysfunction. “I just think we feel like a big club,” Sullivan said in an interview with the Guardian in December 2017. “Not a tinpot club. When players come to look at West Ham, they look at where you play.”

Look deeper, though. Analysing the club chair’s answer nine years on, the conclusion is that this is an owner whose desire to win is cancelled out by his listlessness. Feeling like a big club, after all, is not the same as being a big club. It is a decade since West Ham departed from Upton Park, their tinpot home, and told their fans that doing so would take them to the next level. “A world-class stadium with a world-class team,” was the infamous sell from Karren Brady, the recently departed vice-chair, to which the best retort may be that line in the club’s recent accounts “forecasting a liquidity shortfall in summer 2026”, as well as the “severe but plausible scenario” of relegation causing an even bigger financial crisis three years after victory in the Conference League was followed by the £105m sale of Declan Rice to Arsenal.

• Player stood down from Saturday’s game at Fulham

• Club ‘aware of posts circulating on social media’

Bournemouth have confirmed Álex Jiménez has been omitted from their squad for Saturday’s game at Fulham after they opened an investigation relating to social media posts.

It follows alleged exchanges on social media between Jiménez and an individual who appears to state that they are a 15-year-old girl.

It was the city of Hull where Millwall’s dreams of the top flight last came true all the way back in 1988. Kevin O’Callaghan’s penalty at the old Boothferry Park a mile across town was enough to ensure a 1-0 victory and promotion to the First Division. So with Hull the opponents again and the stakes at their highest, this felt like something of an omen.

But in the end, the events in East Yorkshire this time around nearly 40 years on from one of their greatest triumphs will ultimately be consigned to a footnote in this tie. All the drama and the headlines will instead unfold in south London on Monday evening after a first leg that was littered with tension, but shy of genuine moments that could decide the promotion fortunes of these teams.

Manager dismisses criticism from the ‘celebration police’ and is focused on ensuring his players take the final steps starting at West Ham on Sunday

A long row of team photos line the corridor that leads from the players’ entrance at the Emirates Stadium to the media area, each taken at the beginning of a new season and featuring any trophies won in the previous campaign. Updated every year, it currently dates back to 2002 when Arsène Wenger masterminded the Premier League and FA Cup double that saw Arsenal come from behind to see off Manchester United in the title race, with the photo of the famous Invincibles proudly on display the next but one along.

That represents the last time they were crowned champions – 22 years ago, the longest Arsenal have gone without winning a league title since they claimed their first of 13 in 1931, when Herbert Chapman was at the helm. Walk a bit further and you will see several more FA Cups, including the victory in Mikel Arteta’s first season after he took over from Unai Emery in December 2019, before the silverware on show abruptly ends. But after three successive runners-up finishes, Arsenal suddenly find themselves within touching distance of winning back the trophy they covet more than any other.

Former Chelsea forward is thriving on the south coast and targeting victory over Liverpool in the Women’s FA Cup

Fran Kirby knows what she brings. She always has. The Brighton forward is not young for a footballer but, at 32, she’s not old either and, injury free, is reminding people she still has it. “I know I am not the same player that I was when I was 25, I’m not naive,” she says. “That’s not who I am anymore, but I know what I can bring and that is creativity, the passes that other people won’t try. I’ve always said it: I will always try a pass, even if it doesn’t come off. That’s how I play. I play with risk. Sometimes it doesn’t work, sometimes it does.”

That eye for a pass is frequently on display. A recent standout was Kirby’s assist for Kiko Seike in Brighton’s thrilling 3-2 win over Manchester City. The obvious move was to play a pass into Seike’s feet; instead Kirby squeezed the ball between two defenders, taking them out of the action, and into space for her Japanese teammate to collect and fire in. It was vintage Kirby and, after her Chelsea career was blighted by injuries and pericarditis (inflammation of the heart lining), it is wonderful to see a woman who earned 77 caps for England playing at such a level.

Right-back has unique skill but there is more to his game as he targets European football and an Italy call-up

There is only one place to start with Brentford’s Michael Kayode: his unique baby gender reveal at an empty Gtech Community Stadium in February. The 21-year-old walked towards the West Stand, the frame of the goal covered in balloons, and after wiping the ball with a towel, it was time for his trademark long throw, though on this occasion only from the edge of the D. After the ball rippled the net, pink smoke confirmed his partner, Eleonora, is expecting a girl.

Given Kayode launched the ball 65.4 metres last September – further than any other player in the Premier League since Opta began recording such data in 2019-20 – it is hard not to think he was underselling himself. “I didn’t want to miss,” he says, breaking into laughter, “so I just kept it easy.” Family, friends, a videographer and photographer, plus the couple’s pomeranian, Kiri, were the only ones present. “It was a really special moment and celebrating like this was unbelievable … I just have to say thanks to Brentford for giving me use of the stadium.”

Manager has finished in a playoff spot or higher every year bar one in his 16 seasons with four clubs and is preparing for Stevenage tie

“I’ve been through absolutely everything,” says Dave Challinor. “I’ve won and lost eliminators, won and lost semi-finals and finals, won and lost on penalties. I’ve even had goalkeepers score against me.”

When it comes to the playoffs and promotion, few can match Challinor in terms of experience. For 15 of his 16 seasons as a manager, his teams – Colwyn Bay, Fylde, Hartlepool and now Stockport – have finished in a playoff spot or higher. The exception came in 2019-20 when he moved mid-campaign. When Stockport begin their League One playoff campaign with a semi-final first leg away at Stevenage on Saturday, it will be Challinor’s 12th playoff experience, at every level from the Northern Premier League to League One.

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• Previous high for Category 1 had been $10,990

• Resale tickets for final listed from $8,000 to $11.5m

• New Jersey reps pen letter to Infantino about ticketing

Fifa tripled the price of its best available tickets to the World Cup final, making $32,970 seats available on Thursday for the 19 July match at MetLife Stadium in East Rutherford, New Jersey.

The governing body listed those seats as Front Category 1 on its sales site.

• Barrie and Scott Drewitt-Barlow charged by Essex police

• Trafficking charges relate to sexual exploitation

Two co-owners of the non-league football club Maldon & Tiptree have been charged with human trafficking for sexual exploitation as well as rape after an investigation by Essex police.

Barrie Drewitt-Barlow, 57, was charged with multiple offences on Friday alongside Scott Drewitt-Barlow, 32. Both men, of Southwood Chase, Danbury, Essex, will appear at Chelmsford magistrates court later.

• Full-back was hurt in Bayern-PSG second leg

• Davies has had setbacks since ACL return

• Captain last appeared for Canada in March 2025

Canada captain Alphonso Davies has suffered a hamstring injury that will sideline him for “several weeks”, Bayern Munich said on Friday, potentially disrupting his World Cup preparations.

Davies was injured in Wednesday’s 1-1 draw in the second leg of the Champions League semi-final against holders Paris Saint-Germain, who beat Bayern 6-5 on aggregate.

As the song that has accompanied them on their maiden European adventure promised all along, Crystal Palace are on their way to Leipzig. Sixteen years after rescuing the club he supported as a child from administration, Steve Parish watched on with immense pride as Oliver Glasner’s side held off a spirited challenge from Shakhtar Donetsk to book a showdown with Rayo Vallecano in eastern Germany later this month.

There were ecstatic celebrations as Palace’s players completed a lap of honour in front of their adoring supporters who are still having to pinch themselves over the events of the past 12 months. Glasner may be set to leave after what will be the 60th game of a marathon season but whatever happens after this, he will always have a special place in the club’s history. One of the loudest cheers of the night came when the stadium announcer confirmed that Nottingham Forest – who controversially replaced Palace in the Europa League – had been thrashed 4-0 by Aston Villa in their semi-final.

• Former manager died in September 2025 aged 47

• Burnley exit was ‘catalyst for decline in mental health’

A pre-inquest hearing regarding the former Liverpool manager Matt Beard has heard that his family felt he was “bullied” by Burnley before his death.

Beard, who won back-to-back Women’s Super League titles in 2013 and 2014 with Liverpool, was in charge at Burnley from June to August 2025 before resigning just over three weeks before he died aged 47 on 20 September 2025.

Max Rushden is joined by Barry Glendenning, Nicky Bandini and Paul Watson as Arsenal make a first men’s Champions League final in 20 years … and get an edge in the Premier League.

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On today’s podcast: Arsenal reach the men’s Champions League final for the first time in 20 years, a timely-in-form Bukayo Saka with the decisive goal. They defended like we know they can defend – limiting Atlético to virtually nothing.

The panel discuss why the whole affair wasn’t as nerve-wracking as it should have been. Elsewhere, this win is the second great result for Arsenal in two days after Manchester City dropped points in their 3-3 draw away at Everton on Monday night. It means the title is in Arsenal’s hands with three games to go.

Also, Nottingham Forest make eight changes and still beat Chelsea, Ewan Murray joins us from the jazz bar and we answer your questions.

Chapters:

00:00 - Coming up...

00:49 - Arsenal thought to UCL final

26:47 - City lose vital ground in the Premier League title race

35:08 - Are Chelsea the weirdest team in England?

45:10 - Ewan Murray's jazz corner

1:02:40 - Paul Watson's Vaduz corner

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French teenager has racked up numbers this season that put him on a par with Erling Haaland and Lamine Yamal

Bournemouth have unearthed another diamond in Eli Junior Kroupi. Staff at the club consider the 19-year‑old a generational talent and no wonder, given last weekend the forward became the first teenager to register 12 goals in his debut Premier League season since Robbie Fowler in 1993-94. If Kroupi adds to that tally there is a decent chance it will end with the club qualifying for Europe for the first time.

The numbers speak for themselves: Kroupi has averaged a goal every 121 minutes – only Erling Haaland has a better ratio in the league – and of his 43 shots, 20 have been on target, the joint-best conversion rate with Brentford’s Igor Thiago. Among teenagers in the 21st century, only Romelu Lukaku has scored more in a campaign in the competition (17 in 2012-13, on loan at West Brom from Chelsea), and only Lamine Yamal (16) has scored more among the under-20s in Europe’s top five leagues this term. Kroupi’s name is on the lips of scouts at every elite club, with Barcelona thought to have joined Manchester City and Arsenal in keeping tabs. Bournemouth do not want to sell and would demand at least £80m.

Our correspondents look at how the clubs – who meet on Saturday – got where they are and what must happen next

Liverpool: Not at all. Hindsight offers a few portents, such as the extent of last summer’s upheaval and Arne Slot’s insistence that it was a necessary response to Liverpool’s form towards the end of last season. It was strange to hear a title-winning coach in effect play down his team’s achievement. There was also the tragic death of Diogo Jota to deal with. Only Jota’s teammates and colleagues know the toll that has taken on them individually. But when the transfer window closed on 1 September with the £125m signing of Alexander Isak, taking the summer spend to almost £450m and expectations through the roof, the question asked was whether Liverpool would clean up given the resources at Slot’s disposal.

Arsenal have the advantage in the Premier League title race but will they hold off Manchester City’s challenge?

By WhoScored

Seven games remain: three for Arsenal, four for Manchester City. Seven opportunities for more twists and turns in the title race. Just as City appeared to be building their trademark relentless charge at the end of the season, they self-destructed in the space of 13 minutes at Everton. Jérémy Doku’s extraordinary late equaliser has given them a lifeline, but that 3-3 draw has handed the initiative back to Arsenal. Five points separate the sides and the equation is now brutally simple: if Arsenal win their last three games they will be crowned champions for the first time in 22 years, whereas City must be flawless and hope their rivals stumble.

Premier League titles turn on moments: Sergio Agüero’s 94th-minute winner in 2012, Steven Gerrard’s slip in 2014, Vincent Kompany’s thunderbolt in 2019, or City’s final-day comeback in 2022. The question now is whether the 2025-26 season has already had its defining moment in that Everton game or whether, with seven games to play, this campaign is yet to deliver the scene for which it will be remembered.

The Wellington Phoenix coach reflects on the aftermath of the Olympic spying scandal and leading her team into a first A-League Women’s finals campaign

Football is not the kind of profession that lends itself to time off for birthdays and the like. Especially when you’re preparing to lead Wellington Phoenix into their first A-League women’s finals campaign, as Bev Priestman was last week. Yet, especially when contrasted with last year, when she was still in the midst of a one-year Fifa ban after the spying scandal that engulfed Canada’s women’s football team during the Paris Olympics, being among “her people” turned out to be a gift in and of itself.

“It was my 40th birthday [last week],” Priestman says. “And it’s those moments I think to a year ago, and how I felt.

Striker reflects on the ultimate high with Leicester and the role of the self-titled ‘Inbetweeners’ in his success

“I was just a little freak in the works.” Jamie Vardy is reflecting on his career with the usual levels of self-deprecation and pondering whether anyone could possibly board the same rollercoaster. “It’s not the common way of doing things, is it? I don’t think it will probably happen again, but it did happen for me and it was hard work. It really was tough, but all worth it.”

Humour has always been a preferred Vardy tool for removing the sting from a serious point. He is speaking to mark a new documentary about his rise, which brought him from warehouse work making walking frames and crutches to scarcely credible levels of Premier League success.

Many of us struggle to not get sucked into the content machine, even if we simply say: ‘This doesn’t matter’

Last week a video did the rounds of Diego Simeone getting annoyed with Ben White for walking over an enormous Atlético Madrid crest-doormat placed literally in the middle of the tunnel entrance which Ben White had to walk into to get to the room Atlético Madrid had themselves selected for Ben White to get changed in.

Then on Tuesday night, Diego Simeone walked over an enormous Arsenal crest-doormat situated in the middle of the tunnel at the Emirates Stadium to get to the room Arsenal had themselves selected for Diego Simeone and the rest of his Atlético Madrid side to get changed in.

The tiny Italian club are flying high with the help of the former Arsenal player, ambitious owners and a scouting guru inspired by Football Manager

The serene sound of lapping water is broken only by the whir of a seaplane engine swooping to land. Outside the hangar to which the aircraft will soon return, a crowd has gathered well before kick-off. Later, most will scale the steep steps of the adjacent Stadio Giuseppe Sinigaglia.

To the right sits Villa Carminati, a new private members’ club that also houses hospitality guests on matchdays. It is a unique setting for a unique football club. When bathed in sunshine, as was the case for last Sunday’s goalless draw with Napoli, Como 1907 is a waterside paradise. Or, as their president, Mirwan Suwarso, puts it when drawing parallels between the club and Disney, it is the “theme park” division of the “main brand … Lake Como”.

Defeat to Arsenal could usher in a period of intense change, but whether coach will stick around is an open question

“I love you,” Diego Simeone said, but they only had 14 games to save the season. It was the night before Atlético Madrid faced Barcelona in the Champions League quarter-final first leg in early April and the manager was sitting alongside Antoine Griezmann, unexpectedly opening up in a press conference of all places, emotion and admiration expressed publicly as the end drew near. “A player first, then a friend,” in the coach’s words. Griezmann had recently announced that he was leaving for Orlando City. That was the bad news; the good news was that he would do so at the close of a campaign that could be for ever, that he was still here at all.

The threat had been that Griezmann would go with immediate effect, departing in March before the season was even finished, his American contract already agreed and not easy to change, faced by a reluctance to release him. But how, Atlético’s coach, CEO and teammates insisted, could he leave when the pinnacle of his 10 years at the club unexpectedly still lay ahead? So meetings were held, pressure applied, a solution found that allowed him to stay a little longer and leave a legacy unlike anything else. “The best is still to come,” Griezmann said. “I love you, but if you don’t run, I’m taking you off,” Simeone reminded him. “There are eight league games, one in the cup [final] and, if God wills it, five more Champions League matches.”

• ‘I crossed the line’ says 34-year-old Brazil forward

• Neymar hugs teenage teammate after Santos goal

Neymar has publicly apologised to his Santos teammate Robinho Júnior for slapping him during a training session, as the pair appeared to put the dispute behind them during a game on Tuesday.

Santos said they had opened an investigation this week after the altercation between Neymar and the 18-year-old son of Robinho, the former Real Madrid and Manchester City striker.

Visit will be the first time a North Korean women’s football team has competed on southern soil since the 2014 Incheon Asian Games

A North Korean women’s football club will travel to South Korea this month, marking the first visit by a northern sports delegation in nearly eight years, at a time of near-total estrangement between the two Koreas.

Naegohyang Women’s FC, based in North Korea’s capital Pyongyang, will face South Korea’s Suwon FC Women at Suwon sports complex, on 20 May for the semi-finals of the AFC Women’s Champions League.

In the space of a week the mood has changed, with positive energy replacing suffering, and two trophies are suddenly within reach

It was a soundbite designed to go viral, the kind the ex-pros in the TV studios are always looking to confect; snappy, heavy on hyperbole, bang in the moment. Thierry Henry made it pop on Tuesday night as he interviewed Bukayo Saka on CBS Sports after Arsenal had beaten Atlético Madrid to advance to the Champions League final. “We were the Invincibles. You will be the Unforgettables,” Henry said.

There it was, as laid out by one of the greats, the goalscoring hero of Arsenal’s unbeaten bolt to the 2004 Premier League title, the last one they won.

Manchester City did not choke at Everton to hand Arsenal the advantage but it was another reminder the Premier League’s random qualities are still key

For me Clive, it’s all about the Socratic paradox. The wisest man is the man who knows enough to know he knows nothing. I’ve always said that. Or never said it. Or only said it sometimes. One of those. Either way the Premier League title race could have been designed to prove that, in an age of thundering takes and mega-certainties, nobody actually has any idea what’s going on here.

Manchester City’s draw at Everton on Monday night has already been described as The Moment. Advantage Arsenal. This is the consensus. On Tuesday morning, Rob Earnshaw was asked on Sky Sports if this is “the week the season will be decided” and replied: “ABSOLUTELY,” almost before the question had ended. And while you have to admire Rob Earnshaw’s sense of showmanship, there is still a large chance this might not actually be the case.

Every World Cup, from Uruguay and Italy in 1930 and 1934, to Russia and Qatar in 2018 and 2022, has been to an extent about presenting an image to the world

• This was originally published in the newsletter The World Behind the Cup. Sign up for it here.

Football fans will be well aware that in 1930 Uruguay both hosted and won the first World Cup, but less well known is the diplomatic backstory of the country’s entry on to the international sporting stage. In the 1920s, Uruguay’s foreign minister, who led one of the country’s two rival football associations, coordinated with a diplomat serving in Switzerland to give his federation legitimacy by joining Fifa. The diplomat also entered Uruguay into the 1924 Olympic football tournament in Paris – which was emerging as the premier venue for global football. That provoked panic back in Uruguay: nobody had expected him to do that and nobody quite knew how they would afford it; a federation official ended up having to use his own house as collateral on a loan to pay for the team’s passage across the Atlantic.

Once they got to Europe, Uruguay quickly won admiration. First in nine friendlies as they travelled through Spain and then at the Olympic Games itself, where they became by far the biggest draw. The great novelist Colette was even dispatched to the villa where Uruguay were staying to record her impressions for the newspaper Le Matin. Playing brilliant, coherent passing football, Uruguay took gold at the Games.

This was originally published in the newsletter The World Behind the Cup. Sign up for it here.

John Terry’s journey into the internet pipeline is by no means an isolated case – what makes footballers so susceptible?

And so we ask ourselves: how did it come to this? Did we miss the signs? Were there red flags that went unheeded, cries for help that fell on closed ears, forks in the road not taken? Or ultimately, for all our best efforts, was it always going to end like this? Is it, in fact, possible that John Terry was a far-right sympathiser all along?

Yes, it’s been a chastening week for those who have been fighting Terry’s corner for more than a decade. Who steadfastly defended him against the racism charges, who accepted his explanation that he was simply repeating what Anton Ferdinand had been saying to him, who turned up at his trial in full kit, who lamented his failure to land the coaching jobs he so coveted, who right to the end just wanted to believe.

Our cartoonist on a weekend of genuine excitement at the top and bottom of the English top-flight table

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It was an honour to be asked to help find talent for the men’s team and I am enjoying and benefiting from the responsibility

The buzz after I mentioned doing some scouting in the men’s game for Bayern Munich, during my appearance as an analyst on Swedish broadcaster SVT for the men’s team’s Champions League match against Real Madrid, is a bit of a double-edged sword.

On the one hand, I thought: ‘Why is this such big news? It shouldn’t be.’ On the other hand, I understand it and I’m happy there has been so much positivity and encouragement around it. I hope it widens people’s perspectives and helps break barriers for women working in men’s football, because I think we’re ready for that, men’s football is ready for it and it needs it. I hope it inspires other clubs to see it as a good idea. Why not give these opportunities to someone who wants them and wants to prepare for their career after football?

Having overseen a historic return to the Premier League, businessman is now aiming his sights even higher

Doug King is discussing the night Coventry clinched promotion to the Premier League after 25 years away. He had a tear in his eye when the moment arrived at Blackburn and, after eventually exiting the Ewood Park boardroom, the champagne flowing, the straight-talking owner worth hundreds of millions hunkered down at a Travelodge adjacent to a service station on the M65. “It was ... noisy,” he says, taking a second to land on the best adjective, “because all I could hear pretty much all night was: ‘We are Premier League.’”

It has led King to feel like a party planner of late. The biggest one yet was Monday’s open-top bus parade which started on Jimmy Hill Way, named after the manager who in 1967 led the club into the top flight for the first time. After Coventry were crowned champions last month, King guzzled from the trophy. “I didn’t think the lid would come off, so we had to make the most of that,” he says with a smile.

Only Alexis Sánchez and Thierry Henry have had more prolific first seasons for Arsenal in the Premier League era

By Opta Analyst

Viktor Gyökeres was at the heart of one of Arsenal’s best attacking displays of the season at the weekend, scoring twice and grabbing an assist as Mikel Arteta’s side dismantled Fulham 3-0 at the Emirates on Saturday.

The Swede’s opener, a close-range tap-in following excellent work down the right from Bukayo Saka, was his 20th goal in all competitions for Arsenal this term. A header on the stroke of half-time effectively sealed the result and took Gyökeres to 21 goals in his debut campaign.

Bournemouth face Crystal Palace this weekend before their successful head coaches move on with top level still unclear

On Sunday afternoon, Bournemouth face Crystal Palace: Andoni Iraola, in his fourth-last league game in charge of the home side, against Oliver Glasner in his fifth-last league game in charge of the away side – although the latter also has the Europa Conference League to deal with. Both managers are out of contract at the end of the season, and both hope to move on to a club with a substantially bigger budget.

That’s understandable. This has been an uncomfortable season for Glasner, whose frustration at the club’s financial limitations was perhaps expressed a little too publicly, but history will remember him as the manager who won Crystal Palace the FA Cup. More prosaically, with the 12th-highest wage bill in the Premier League, he has taken Palace to 10th and 12th, while they started the weekend 13th. And there remains the possibility of a glorious farewell with Conference League success in Leipzig.

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The state-owned football team it’s OK to like (and proof that sportswashing works), Paris Saint-Germain booked their place in Bigger Cup final courtesy of a draw against Bayern Munich at the Allianz Arena. Like Shaun Murphy in Monday’s night’s thrilling denouement of the World Snooker Championship at the Crucible Theatre, the German champions didn’t do a great deal wrong and were similarly gracious in defeat despite their obvious disappointment. “The level of both teams was very, very high,” sighed Vincent Kompany as he ruminated on his team’s exit. “PSG have so much quality, they’ve probably been the best team in Europe in the last two years.” A team that is currently so good it was forced to replace deadweight no-marks such as Kylian Mbappé, Lionel Messi and Neymar to finally shed their tag as Bigger Cup nearlymen and bottlers, the willingness of their replacements to do the dirty work of defending played no small part in helping PSG get over the line.

Doing some half-hearted/@rsed research of potential Bigger Vase finalists, Braga, I drifted into a section about the city’s famous old inhabitants. One of these was a 16th-century skeptic philosopher called Francisco Sanches, who claimed that nobody knows anything, particularly those who say they do. With a European campaign – that was helmed, briefly, by both Big Ange and Sean Dyche (et al) – potentially ending in an unlikely final, Forest seem to have proved old Fran-San’s point” – Andrew Boulton.

It’s interesting that Declan Rice thinks that Arsenal’s achievements can’t be underestimated (yesterday’s Football Daily). The only things that can’t be underestimated are things that are extremely small. Anything large can easily be underestimated” – Bob Cushion (and others).

Maybe Chester and Wrexham (yesterday’s Football Daily, full email edition) could go down the Forest/Derby route and rename the A483 to ‘Phil Parkinson Way’?” – Jim Hearson.

Am I the only one who saw this fine picture of Pep Guardiola and Jordan Pickford at the Hill Dickinson Stadium on Monday night and thought: ‘All this really needs is the addition of an ‘I’ and an ‘S’ to be perfect?’” – Adam Sherlock.

Sunday’s edition of the famous rivalry felt like the least important in years, except for the uncertain futures of both managers

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It’s been a long time since a Manchester United v Liverpool game felt of less consequence. These are the two most successful sides in English league history, hailing from neighbouring cities and they have a rivalry that stretches back well over a century. Yet it felt perhaps only the seventh-most significant fixture of the weekend, behind the games involving the two title contenders, Arsenal and Manchester City, and the four sides still scrapping to avoid joining Wolves and Burnley in being relegated this season – Leeds, Nottingham Forest, West Ham and Tottenham.

United’s 3-2 win sealed their place in next season’s Champions League while, barring very odd swings of goal difference, Liverpool need just three points from their remaining three games to be certain of their own qualification. For both, the biggest issue now is deciding who manages them next season – and this was a ragged enough game to cast doubts over the suitability of Michael Carrick and Arne Slot for their respective sides.

Plus: youngest players to score a trophy-clinching goal, an apology to Albert Kidd and keepers seeing red

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“Sheffield Wednesday finished their Championship season on zero points, accumulating 18 points throughout their 46-game season after being handed an 18-point deduction for severe financial mismanagement,” notes Michael Butler. “But has any team finished on zero points simply because they lost every league game?”

There are many instances of teams finishing on zero points (with deductions), but one really has to delve deep to find those teams unfortunate enough to lose every single match in a full season. Even Fort William, famously branded as the “worst football team in Britain” after going 840 days and 73 matches without a win in 2019, managed to dig out a couple of draws in those seasons.

Max Rushden is joined by Barry Glendenning, Mark Langdon and Archie Rhind-Tutt after PSG progressed past Bayern

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On today’s podcast: Bayern and PSG didn’t provide another nine-goal thriller, as per the first leg, but it was an entertaining game in Munich as PSG progressed with a 6-5 aggregate win to the final, as the French side seek consecutive Champions League titles. As scary as PSG look, at least Arsenal fans don’t have to worry about the prospect of Harry Kane winning the Champions League at their expense.

OL Lyonnes ended Arsenal’s Champions League hopes while Rebecca Knaak puts Man City on the brink of WSL title glory

Who is the best female player in the world right now? Melchie Dumornay continues to make a strong claim for that accolade after her starring role in OL Lyonnes’ comeback to beat Arsenal in the Champions League semi-finals. The fearless Haiti international won a first-half penalty and provided a superb assist for Jule Brand’s late winner in the second leg, as well as being a constant thorn in Arsenal’s side with her pace, trickery and energy. The attacking midfielder, having missed the first leg through injury, helped the French side come from 2-1 down to win 4-3 on aggregate. Tom Garry

Arne Slot is fuming, Mikel Arteta’s big risk pays off and Josh Dasilva enjoys an emotional return for Brentford

Arne Slot was seething as he lamented the decision to allow Manchester United’s second goal to stand despite claims of handball by Benjamin Sesko. “The curve on the ball changed so there must have been a contact,” argued the Liverpool head coach. “But it’s no surprise to anyone that if there is a VAR intervention then the decision goes against us. It’s happened to us all season.” As PGMO confirmed at the time, however, there “was no conclusive evidence that Sesko handled the ball before scoring”. Slot was stretching it to pin Liverpool’s latest defeat on poor refereeing. United’s movement pulled the visitors apart in the first half and, without the injured Mohamed Salah, Hugo Ekitiké and Alexander Isak, the threat from Liverpool was nonexistent until capitalising on two errors early in the second half. Defeat stemmed from an anaemic first-half performance, nothing else. Andy Hunter

Match report: Manchester United 3-2 Liverpool

Match report: Arsenal 3-0 Fulham

Match report: Newcastle 3-1 Brighton

Match report: Aston Villa 1-2 Tottenham

Match report: Brentford 3-0 West Ham

Match report: Leeds 3-1 Burnley

Ousmane Dembélé becomes our seventh winner as he beats Lamine Yamal into second and Vitinha into third on our list of the best players on the planet

• Premier League dominates list | How every judge voted | Our methodology | The top 100 female players for 2025

• 2024 edition | 2023 | 2022 | 2021 | 2020 | 2019 | 2018 | 2017 | 2016 | 2015 | 2014 | 2013 | 2012

The Frenchman, who has been named the best male footballer in the world by the Guardian, has benefitted from PSG’s focus on the team rather than individuals

What makes a good player great, and a great player the best? This question has been occupying me since 2014, when the Guardian first asked me to contribute to its inaugural Next Generation feature. My job was to look for a France-based talent born in 1997 who could go on to have a stellar career.

After a great deal of research, I narrowed it down from my shortlist of five by asking questions not about the players’ football ability, but about other attributes: resilience, adaptability, decision-making, creativity, work ethic, response to feedback and willingness to learn. Qualities we cannot see, and are harder to measure.

Aitana Bonmatí has been voted the best female player on the planet by our panel of 127 experts ahead of Mariona Caldentey and Alessia Russo

• 2024 list | 2023 | 2022 | 2021 | 2020 | 2019 | 2018

• Meet the judges | See how every judge voted

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The margin may have got smaller but the brilliant Spanish midfielder makes it a hat-trick of No 1 finishes

They say the best things come in threes, and Aitana Bonmatí has written herself into the Guardian’s top 100 history as the first player to finish at the top of the tree for a third consecutive year.

Last year the majestic midfielder emulated her Barcelona and Spain teammate Alexia Putellas by winning for a second year running, but the 27-year-old has now gone one better, establishing herself once again at the top of the women’s game.

From PSG’s Ibrahim Mbaye to Brazil’s next hope, we select some of the most talented players born in 2008. Check the progress of our classes of 2024 | 2023 | 2022 | 2021 | 2020 | 2019 … and go even further back. Here’s our Premier League class of 2025