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Ruben Amorim inherited a mess but his position being under threat so early is simply life in football’s hottest seat

Soap opera, wall-to‑wall media coverage, a sporting Truman Show and real-life panopticon. Ruben Amorim, like those before him, blinks in the glare of the endless fascination with Manchester United’s leading man, and may wonder whether this is the impossible job.

Three games into a first full campaign the 40-year-old seemed to believe so. The desultory 12-11 Carabao Cup penalty shootout defeat at Grimsby followed a 1-0 loss to Arsenal and 1-1 draw at Fulham. Three matches, zero wins, and the executioner’s song began to wail for the Portuguese’s job security.

• Palace had agreed £35m fee with Liverpool for defender

• ‘Credit to the chairman. I didn’t have to threaten anybody’

Oliver Glasner has praised Steve Parish for deciding not to sell Marc Guéhi to Liverpool on transfer deadline day after he warned the Crystal Palace chair that failing to replace their captain would be “very, very risky”.

Palace had agreed a £35m fee with Liverpool for Guéhi – who completed the first part of his medical in anticipation of the move – but Parish dramatically pulled the plug at the last minute after failing to find an adequate replacement.

• Champions signed Wirtz and Isak during transfer window

• ‘They have recruited the two most decisive players’

Mikel Arteta believes Liverpool have assembled the strongest squad in the Premier League after the acquisition of Alexander Isak. Liverpool broke their transfer record twice this summer, signing Florian Wirtz from Bayer Leverkusen in a deal which could rise to £116m, before spending £125m on Isak on deadline day.

The champions spent more than £400m, though their net outlay was slightly less than that of Arsenal, who recruited eight players. Liverpool have won their first three games and signed off for the international break with a 1-0 win over Arsenal at Anfield.

Arsenal came from behind for the second time in two games to move top of the Women’s Super League. This time it was an own goal from goalkeeper Daphne van Domselaar that put them in trouble, before strikes by Frida Maanum, Stina Blackstenius, Caitlin Foord and two from Alessia Russo ensured the European champions maintained a 100% start to the season.

It is early in the new campaign but in a 12-team league every point matters and for a side desperate to stop Chelsea from winning a seventh consecutive title, dropping points so soon into the campaign would be bruising. This is a new Arsenal though, one fuelled by a fire lit by their phenomenal defeat of Barcelona in the Champions League final in May. They know they can beat the best, now they have to prove they can beat the best, the worst and those in between consistently.

Before Saturday’s derby, fans wonder if it would be so bad to have a chair delivering occasional success on and off the pitch

It will not only be fans of Tottenham looking on with interest when the architects of one of English football’s most astonishing acts of corporate brutality watch life after Daniel Levy begin with a game against rivals where most supporters are waiting for something similar to happen at their club.

The small talk should be fascinating when the owners of West Ham welcome members of the Lewis family into the directors’ box at the London Stadium on Saturday afternoon. And how was your international break? Get up to much? And just when did you decide that it was time for Daniel to step down as chair?

Women’s Super League’s new £1m players at London City Lionesses and Chelsea have a tough act to follow after Smith’s stunning Arsenal opener

The women’s game’s first £1m signing, Olivia Smith, wasted no time at all in demonstrating her worth as she scored a goal‑of‑the‑season contender on her debut for Arsenal. As the Women’s Super League’s approaches its second weekend, the gauntlet has already been thrown down for the second and third players to arrive in the WSL for a seven-figure transfer fee to respond.

Chelsea’s new signing, Alyssa Thompson, and the newest arrival at London City Lionesses, Grace Geyoro, are in line for their debuts on Sunday. Chelsea travel to Aston Villa and London City host Manchester United at midday.

Arsenal host Ange Postecoglou’s Nottingham Forest on Saturday before the Manchester derby on Sunday

Saturday 12.30pm TNT Sports 1 Venue Emirates Stadium

Former Spurs manager had his 60th birthday plans upended by job offer but feels ‘things happen for a reason’

Ange Postecoglou walked out of the City Ground tunnel, which is decorated with famous images from yesteryear, and surveyed the scene. Just like that, the new Nottingham Forest head coach, in a blue suit, open‑neck white shirt and Paul Smith trainers – the designer is a son of the city – was back in business. He posed with the garibaldi red shirt and before long was explaining how Forest’s move interrupted his belated 60th birthday celebrations last weekend. “We had this whole thing planned, The Hangover-style, but we were in bed by 10pm as we realised our age,” Postecoglou said.

It was in May, when the Europa League trophy parade halted outside the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium, that Postecoglou provided a memorable mic-drop moment: declaring that season three always eclipses season two in the best TV series. Four months after being sacked, replacing Nuno Espírito Santo three games into the Premier League season, provided quite the plot twist.

Two of the summer’s biggest transfer moves from Germany to the Premier League are starkly contrasting prospects

What must a footballer who costs €80m, €100m or more be able to do and prove? He should be a promising prospect at the age of 17 to 20; occupy a clear position on the pitch; be one of the five most important players in a team; perform consistently over many years; prove himself in international competition; and be physically strong. This applies to virtually all those players in this price range: Kylian Mbappé, Neymar, Ronaldo, Erling Haaland, Jude Bellingham and Ousmane Dembélé.

Two German footballers moved to the Premier League for such a sum in the summer. One of them meets these criteria. Florian Wirtz’s career has been impressive. He caught the football’s attention as a teenager. It was only a matter of time before he made his breakthrough.

Here’s how to follow along with our coverage – the finest writing and up-to-the-minute reports

Exiles from the Taliban in England and Australia are using the sport to battle prejudice and give a voice to women and girls in Afghanistan

“I felt quite lost,” says the goalkeeper Elaha Safdari. “I didn’t know anyone, but little by little football gave me the strength and power to start again, to start from zero, to build, to keep going and to keep pushing myself forward.”

It is four years since a 17-year-old Safdari arrived in England, part of the Afghanistan women’s development team evacuated first to Pakistan then to the UK after the US withdrawal of troops and the concession of power to the Taliban.

Shutting out a hefty majority of countries – 35 out of 47 – is a risky strategy for premier club competition in the world’s biggest continent

There are plenty of similarities between the Champions Leagues run by the Asian Football Confederation (AFC) and Uefa. The two tournaments now follow the same calendar – Asia recently transitioned from a spring start to an autumn one – and the group stage, which kicks off next week, has the same unwieldy format whereby teams play eight opponents once. Also, neither competition involves many Asian nations. Uefa’s version has two – Israel and Kazakhstan – while the AFC’s has 11, with Australia coming in from Oceania to complete the dozen.

However, whatever the problems with Europe’s biggest club tournament, every country is represented and has a theoretical chance of getting to the group stage and, ultimately, all the way to the title. Fifty-three out of the 55 member associations (Russia and Liechtenstein are the absentees) have at least one hopeful. That is true of only 12 of 47 in the AFC Champions League Elite. Three-quarters of Asian countries are either nowhere to be seen or located in the two lower-tier tournaments, which pretty much amounts to the same thing.

La Liga’s salary limit applies to the whole club and with six players leaving this summer, is the club’s golden era over?

How times have changed. For the past few years Barcelona have been the team everyone wanted to join: five consecutive Champions League finals, stylish football, leaders in women’s football, a stunning city and Ballon d’Or winners for teammates. However, 10 years after becoming professional, the three-time European champions are a club in trouble.

Restricted by La Liga’s financial fair play rules, the women’s team have had a calamitous summer transfer window. There have been six departures – all to the Women’s Super League – while the midfielder Alba Caño is leaving for the NWSL in January. They made only one signing, Laia Aleixandri on a free transfer from Manchester City.

• Charges relate to Roman Abramovich era

• Club settled similar case with Uefa in 2023

Chelsea are expecting to be hit with a substantial financial sanction for transfer misdemeanours, after the Football Association charged them on Thursday with 74 breaches of its rules relating to the use of football agents.

The club now face a lengthy charge sheet after an investigation into transfer activity under the ownership of Roman Abramovich. They are accused, among other claims, of ­making undisclosed payments to secure transfers. Deals under the spotlight include those for Eden ­Hazard, Willian and Samuel Eto’o.

• Uefa describes it as an ‘important and growing issue’

• Barcelona and Milan lined up for league matches abroad

Uefa has postponed a decision on whether to allow domestic league matches to be played abroad and promised a consultation with “all stakeholders … including fans” regarding the controversial plans.

The move casts uncertainty over proposals to play Villarreal v Barcelona and Milan v Como in the US and Australia respectively this season. Consultation is expected to begin soon, however, perhaps leaving the door open for those matches to go ahead.

• EFL wants to add National League-style eliminators

• Plan could be expanded to Leagues One and Two

The English Football League is in talks over adding an eliminator round to the Championship playoffs and increasing the number of participants from four to six.

The proposal is a similar format to the one used by the National League. In the Championship the team that finish fifth would play the eighth-placed team and sixth would meet seventh in one-off ties at the higher-ranked team’s home stadium.

• Enhanced security measures at the London Stadium

• Mohammed Kudus’s return among potential flashpoints

West Ham have taken the unusual step of banning half-and-half scarves for the London derby against Tottenham.

The move is among a number of increased security measures aimed at preventing away supporters from getting into the home sections at the London Stadium for a potentially volatile match.

Every deal in the NWSL, WSL, Liga F, Frauen-Bundesliga, Première Ligue and Serie A Femminile as well as a club-by-club guide

• Men’s transfers summer 2025: all the moves

All the latest Premier League, La Liga, Bundesliga, Ligue 1 and Serie A deals and a club-by-club guide

• Women’s transfers summer 2025: all the moves

Ange Postecoglou’s Forest bow, a new-look forward line at Newcastle and a Manchester derby to forget for any loser

Ange Postecoglou never won a north London derby while in charge at Tottenham, drawing one and losing three, so starting life in the Nottingham Forest dugout away to Arsenal may not be the ideal situation. It has been a whirlwind week for the 60-year-old who has replaced Nuno Espírito Santo and it will be fascinating to see what changes are made to the team’s style. Nuno is a cautious coach and would have plotted a counterattacking approach at the Emirates Stadium, but there are no guarantees with Postecoglou. Pragmatism is a word rarely associated with the Australian but he needs to get his players onside quickly after the unfortunate departure of his predecessor, who was not dismissed for footballing reasons. It may make more sense to tweak what has already been constructed on strong foundations, especially considering he will have little time with the squad after international duty and before a Saturday lunchtime kick-off. Being able to adapt is a sign of strength in a coach and Postecoglou needs to show he has learned from errors made at Tottenham when he refused to change. Will Unwin

Arsenal v Nottingham Forest, Saturday 12.30pm (all times BST)

Bournemouth v Brighton, Saturday 3pm

Crystal Palace v Sunderland, Saturday 3pm

Everton v Aston Villa, Saturday 3pm

Moyes has brought a dull team to life by giving creative players such as Jack Grealish the freedom to flourish

By WhoScored

No Premier League side had more goalless draws last season than Everton. In recent years, Goodison Park became a fortress of attrition, a place where survival mattered more than spectacle. Four years of relegation scraps drained hope, and “boring” became a label Everton fans could hardly argue with. But, after moving to their new £800m stadium, something shifted.

A 2-0 win over Brighton did not just mark a new chapter in a new home; it felt like a different Everton entirely. Jack Grealish, a summer arrival on loan from Manchester City, and Iliman Ndiaye combined for the stadium’s first goal; the team played with freedom and flair; and, for the first time in years, fans left the stadium with a feeling of real hope for the season ahead. Everton’s newfound optimism proved justified in their next game, a five-goal thriller against Wolves. Their 3-2 win at Molineux sent them into the top five in the Premier League.

What goes on tour, stays on tour as Uefa meets to discuss La Liga’s and Serie A’s request to play competitive matches abroad

The caramel-coloured tiles on the facade are long gone, and the name changed eight years ago, and there are now wraparound LED screens and an “immersive” museum experience and a lot more bright yellow than you would ideally want. And it’s harder to park right next to the ground like you used to, and many of the locals still insist on calling it El Madrigal. But still they come every other weekend, and buy horchata from the stalls out the front, and sit with the same old friends in the same old bars with the same old faded photos on the wall. Because for all that has changed over the years, this is still their town, their team, their tradition. And when their beloved Villarreal are playing there is nowhere else they would rather be.

But when they play their home game against Barcelona the week before Christmas, the Estadio de la Cerámica is likely to be sitting empty. For the small industrial town of 50,000 just off the A7 motorway, it will feel just like any other night. The classic club anthems will reverberate not in Castellón but more than 4,000 miles away in the Miami suburbs. And football’s dystopian, fungible future will never have been closer to becoming its dystopian, fungible present.

Former Brentford striker missed out on England’s qualifiers but he believes the standard of Saudi football should not be ignored

Ivan Toney is aware of the outside noise. He hardly needs reminding that plenty of people have had their say since he swapped the Premier League for the Saudi Pro League just over a year ago. An Asian Champions League winner’s medal and 35 goals for Al-Ahli later, the striker is defiant, even if he found himself on the outside as England played their latest World Cup qualifiers.

“Those that know me, know that I do what I want to do,” Toney says. “If there is something I want to go for, to try, then I will do it. If people want to talk, they can talk. It doesn’t hurt me, doesn’t bother me, I just concentrate on myself. I do what makes me happy.”

An upbeat Jamie Vardy insists he is ‘never to old to learn’ on his unveiling at the newly promoted Serie A club

In Cremona everything is about music: the city, located in the heart of the Po Valley, is where the greatest luthier of all time, Antonio Stradivari, was born. His violins – unique pieces, each identified by a name – are today in the hands of some of the greatest musicians in the world and can fetch a price of more than £10m.

So it was no coincidence that the Violin Museum, in Piazza Guglielmo Marconi, was chosen to unveil who the city’s football team, Cremonese, hope will become their greatest soloist: Jamie Vardy.

Forty-eight teams will participate in next summer’s World Cup and 30 places are still up for grabs

Forty-eight teams will participate in next summer’s World Cup, with the hosts, Canada, Mexico and the United States, granted automatic entry. A further 43 places are determined by qualifying competitions from the six confederations and the remaining two will be decided at March’s six-team intercontinental playoffs in Monterrey and Guadalajara. After this month’s internationals, 18 countries have places booked. The draw is due to take place on 5 December at Washington’s Kennedy Center.

Brazil lost qualifiers in Argentina, Uruguay, Paraguay and Bolivia … just like they did before the 2002 World Cup

Despite how it might look on paper, Brazil did not necessarily hit a new low at high altitude by losing 1-0 against Bolivia this week. As their place at the World Cup was already reserved, Carlo Ancelotti could afford to field a second-string side with seven changes. It looked like they would return home from 4,000 metres above sea level with a draw until Bruno Guimarães gave away a penalty.

Miguel Terceros smashed the spot-kick past Alisson, securing a place in the playoffs for the hosts, who are now dreaming of reaching the World Cup for the first time since 1994, which is, of course, when Brazil won the tournament in the US. This has been a successful campaign for Bolivia. Not so Brazil, who finished fifth in the table with just 28 points from 18 games, making it the worst qualification campaign in their history.

After a 2-0 loss to South Korea and a win by the same scoreline against Japan, our experts consider the state of the program overall

Yes, any time a World Cup host country and a generation of prodigies lose a handful of consecutive games with their A-team, or what passes for one, alarm bells should be ringing. That’s not to say all is lost. While Mauricio Pochettino’s optimism rankled after a 2-0 loss to a South Korea side that had a disconcertingly easy time of it, there was much more to feel good about in the 2-0 win over Japan. Still, it was one game. Japan rested a lot of regulars. (Then again, the US were hardly at full strength.) LS

Mauricio Pochettino made big changes to the US setup, and the moves paid off with the team’s most complete performance in a long while

This United States’ international window once looked like it could be disastrous. Now, it has been upgraded to strangely uneven.

A much-improved US got goals from Alejandro Zendejas and Folarin Balogun to beat a heavily rotated Japan side 2-0 at Lower.com Field in Columbus. The result lends some credence to Mauricio Pochettino’s insistence that the US’s recent subpar results were all part of a plan with a single target: arriving at the World Cup in peak form.

Supporters are putting money into their teams in a typically collective response to financial crisis

There seems to be a not-for-profit association for everything in France, from amateur mycology to choral music and international disaster relief. There were one and a half million Associations Loi 1901 at the last count, which equates to one for every 48 inhabitants, with 60,000 to 70,000 new groups created each year. They constitute an essential part of the fabric of French society, a natural response to every kind of need felt by local communities – except when it comes to organised football.

This is odd, considering professionalism was introduced by the French FA as late as 1932 after a decade of hand-wringing and it would have been natural for practitioners of the game to take the matter in their own hands. Yet in France, club ownership at all but the lowest level has always been the preserve of private individuals, local authorities and, a very French trait, businesses that have set up teams for their employees, the football corporatif or football entreprise, which has its own leagues and federation.

British prime ministers have been pretty much invisible on the terraces … until now. And football is always telling you things

If you’d told Keir Starmer last summer that just over a year after his election as prime minister he would single‑handedly, and by the sheer force of his own personality, have stopped England fans from singing songs about the IRA and Ten German Bombers, he would no doubt have been delighted. I guess they must really like me then. Phase One Goals. You warned me off, Jeremy, but I knew the Arsenal thing was a good idea.

Either way Starmer has now made this happen. England fans are not singing about those things any more. They are instead singing about him being a wanker and how he should fuck off, something they continued to do this week from Birmingham to Belgrade. So, a partial success then, Sir Keir. Delivery. Pragmatism. Yes, I think we can work with this.

Offloading the error-prone goalkeeper has added to rather than solved the goalkeeping conundrum at Old Trafford

Altay Bayindir: age 27, seven Premier League appearances for Manchester United and a catalogue of game-costing errors. Senne Lammens: age 23, has never played in English football. Tom Heaton: age 39, last Premier League game January 2020, for Aston Villa. André Onana: age 29, 72 Premier League matches, Champions League and Europa League finalist, and a catalogue of game-costing errors.

The first three are goalkeepers Ruben Amorim can field on Sunday in the derby at Manchester City and beyond. The last is the keeper who is joining Trabzonspor for the season in what appears to be one more head-scratching development at a club that continues to seek clarity.

Domestic game risks being ripped from its fabric as La Liga and Serie A seek approval from Uefa to play fixtures abroad

It has been called the biggest existential threat to European football since the ill-fated Super League. Now it is on the verge of becoming reality and the implications will be far reaching if, as widely expected, La Liga and Serie A are given permission in the coming weeks to host domestic games abroad. The sport risks being ripped from its fabric should Barcelona and Villarreal be allowed to break the mould and stage a top-flight fixture in Miami this December.

The topic has dominated discussion in football’s corridors of power recently and, at the heart of a complex and deeply emotive problem, the immediate equation is simple. If Uefa’s executive committee agrees to the plans when it convenes in Tirana on Thursday the final say will be down to Fifa, probably at a meeting of its council on 2 October. The global governing body would be unlikely to put up opposition and the question, at that point, will be just how earth-shattering a precedent has been set.

The juggernaut was captured in one three-month tracking shot, but this summer market told us something deeper – about football and the nation

By the time the clock hit 7.30pm the main presenter on Monday’s Sky Sports Window Slam Countdown looked not just frazzled, but oddly heroic, like a man who has ingested a potentially fatal overdose of late-breaking excitement and is now being encouraged to keep talking in a low, dogged voice about massive deals and unexpected snags just to keep himself awake until the paramedics arrive.

There was something of the Situation Room about the whole tableau, five nobly dishevelled talking heads leaning in around the curved tables, lists of names earnestly reeled off. Eberechi Eze. Randal Kolo Muani. We’re hearing that Coventry has fallen. In the bottom corner of the screen a picture of Marc Guéhi would flash up now and then reproachfully, Guéhi wearing a strange, lost smile as though he has in fact died. And below it all the countdown clock replaced with the simple end‑of‑days message: WINDOW CLOSED.

Our cartoonist looks back at a departed hero’s memorable moments after his 25-year reign at Spurs

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• David’s latest book, Chaos in the Box: buy it now

We assess how each top-flight side fared in the search for quality and value during the summer window

• Transfer interactive: all the deals from across Europe

Andrea Berta’s first transfer window since taking over as sporting director has been busy. Headline moves for Viktor Gyökeres and Eberechi Eze have given Mikel Arteta the firepower and creativity he asked for, while Martín Zubimendi has added class to midfield. The arrival of Cristhian Mosquera, Christian Nørgaard, Noni Madueke and Kepa Arrizabalaga has also added depth to Arsenal’s squad that is already being called on after a series of early season injuries, while the late signing of the exciting Ecuador defender Piero Hincapié should prove to be a shrewd addition. Ed Aarons

Behind the scenes on transfer window’s final day as the Hatters bagged their top target in a loan deal

“Can my dog live in the apartment?” Ben Osborn asks Stockport’s first-team scouting operations manager, Dale Hargan. The Derby midfielder is about to undergo a medical before joining the League One side on a season-long loan and there are questions that need to be answered.

It is deadline day and Osborn has left his East Midlands home for the prospect of more regular playing time. He will be one of three arrivals at Edgeley Park before the window closes, the end of half a year of planning for Stockport. It looks like everything has gone smoothly when Osborn eventually signs the relevant paperwork at 6pm in the boardroom at the club’s training ground clad in official merchandise. Relief can be seen on the faces of the recruitment team. Their hard work has paid off.

Swede is not a classic central striker, but could his signing herald tactical tweaks and what does it mean for Salah?

On the face of it, it’s not hard to see why Liverpool would want Alexander Isak. He will not turn 26 until later this month and has scored more than 20 Premier League goals in each of the past two seasons, something matched only by Erling Haaland. But he offers more than just goals; he’s a very modern centre-forward.

Thirty or 40 years ago, when 4-4-2 was still the dominant formation, strike pairings tended to come in two forms: either target-man and finisher, or creator and finisher. These days, the very best centre-forwards combine traits of all three. This is not entirely new: the days of Kenny Dalglish and Ian Rush or Niall Quinn and Kevin Phillips are long gone and football has been familiar for some time with players of the ilk of Didier Drogba, Andriy Shevchenko and Radamel Falcao, forwards with pace and some blend of physicality and technical ability.

Arsenal’s cautious, cagey, risk-averse approach showed a lack of adventure and they paid the price against Liverpool

You can get it if you really want. You really can. You can get it. Getting it is a distinct and achievable outcome. There is just one caveat. You do have to actually show some sign of wanting to get it, to throw a little risk to the wind.

This seemed to be the catch for Mikel Arteta at Anfield, on a day where for long periods his Arsenal team were in the ascendancy, dishing up a performance that was assured and compact, but also a bit like watching a politician giving a campaign interview on live TV where the idea is to simply say nothing, wear the right tie, filibuster, convinced that if nothing happens then good things are probably happening. This felt like a kind of high-end Starmer-ball. Hold the line. Let the other guy lose.

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It was fitting that Jamie Vardy was given an audience at the Violin Museum in Cremona, because at least they had access to a very small one to play for the striker about having to finish his career in picturesque Lombardy rather than the East Midlands. He is also a classical showman but, aged 38, some suspect that the former England international is a spent force. Vardy has been doubted from Stocksbridge Park Steels to the Champions League, though, and has always delivered. “It is up to me to disprove the predictions,” he chirped. “Age is just a number. I always listen to my legs. At the moment I still feel great. During my whole career I have been underestimated and I worked to prove everyone wrong, and I have succeeded in doing that.”

This is an extract from our daily football email … Football Daily. To get the full version, just visit this page and follow the instructions.

Star names have been missing but second half of campaign should bring renewed interest after ratings spike last year

Halfway through the NWSL’s 13th regular season, the league reported TV ratings were trending down. But August has already shown glimmers of recovery and context adds important caveats to that downward slope.

As first reported by Sports Business Journal, when the league took a month-long break midway through the year in July, ratings were down by 8% across their multiplatform media partnership. That partnership, which is now in its second year, was signed in November 2023 with CBS, ESPN, ION (Scripps Sports) and Prime Video for a deal worth $240m – a huge increase from their previous one-party partnership with CBS worth $4.5m. In its first year, the league saw a big uptick in viewing numbers as matches proliferated across a variety of outlets, reaching a wider audience.

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The joy of a Bigger Cup European tour is what makes a season for the fans – the trinket on offer in Budapest is merely a bonus. Six Premier League sides will get to test themselves against the best over the coming months and there are a few new faces in the competition and some intriguing passport stamps to collect. Who wouldn’t want to travel to the Cypriot city of Paphos in September to watch their beloved club play David Luiz’s Pafos FC? The temperature reaches 29C and there is no chance of rain. There are miles and miles of beaches to enjoy with a Keo in hand. If anything, the prospect of a 90-minute match is a bit of a distraction. The even better news is there are flights from London, Manchester and Newcastle.

I’m someone who is passionate and will fight ever[y] time I step on the pitch. But I need to set a better example and you fans know how much I love you and this club” – West Ham’s Jarrod Bowen takes to InstaChat to expain why he appeared to lose his cool with a West Ham fan after they were knocked out of the Milk Cup by Wolves.

A doff of the cap to the Leeds fans, who went from chanting Sheffield Wednesday’s hopefully soon to be ex-owner, Dejphon Chansiri’s name to booing their own side and leaving during the penalty shootout as they lost to what is essentially our under-21 team. And an extra doff of the cap to Dominic Calvert-Lewin, making his debut for Leeds, who fluffed three easy chances to win it for them in the last 10 minutes and then, in the penalty shootout, did his own heartwarming tribute to Wednesday legend Chris Waddle (circa Italia 1990). Hurrah!” – Noble Francis.

Thank you Celtic for giving us the daunting prospect of impossible away-day draws, cheesy headlines and, worst of all, hearing about that teenager Chelsea have already signed until 2068 every single week. Yes Kairat Almighty, the unbeaten at home Beast from the Far East. The broadcasters and tabloids are going to milk this to the last drop aren’t they? As a Spurs fan, I am already dreading the second half of our inevitable fixture against them. I hope you enjoy Bigger Vase, Celtic” –Yannick Woudstra.

I can assure Alex Cameron (yesterday’s Football Daily) he was not alone in his interpretation of your wine-related strapline. Maybe readers could suggest suitable managerial or player candidates to receive a bottle of Chateau d’Arse, an amusing little Fitou from the Languedoc-Rousillon region” – Max Maxwell.

Federico Macheda (yesterday’s Football Daily) – now there’s a blast from the past! The last time I heard that name, I looked like Jack Grealish before he signed for City. Fortunately, as someone who’s only 40 in January, I’m still some ways away from looking like Everton Grealish” – Rowan Sweeney.

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The Premier League’s big return this weekend brings to mind the story of Chuck Cunningham. No, he’s not a flinty young American prospect snapped up on deadline day; he was Richie Cunningham’s older brother on US sitcom Happy Days. Chuck was a bit-part character played by three different actors – until one day, he said goodnight to the family, headed upstairs and simply never came back down again. His clumsy departure gave rise to “Chuck Cunningham Syndrome”, where characters change appearance, relocate or disappear altogether to leave viewers scratching their heads.

We are a big store but they were very lucky we had enough boots in stock that were the right size. They paid between £200 and £230 for each pair and £30 for the shin guards. We have had the odd player come in because they have left their boots behind but never the entire team” – a local sports shop owner in Bergen, Andre Gullord, had a day to remember after a number of Manchester United players’ boots were lost en route to their Women’s Bigger Cup qualifier game at Brann on Thursday. United were forced to buy replacements just hours before the crucial first-leg tie, which they lost 1-0. “We are investigating how this happened,” sighed a club statement, with the bill thought to be around £4,000. “In the meantime, we have secured new boots for all the affected players.” In cost-saving measures that are sure to please penny-pinching billionaire Big Sir Jim Ratcliffe, midfielder Lisa Naalsund, who is from Bergen, asked her mother to bring some boots to the stadium for her.

Rather than adding a further round to the promotion playoffs [yesterday’s full email edition], I wonder if the EFL has thought of having all 24 teams involved. Maybe they could all play each other home and away to make it fairer, with some kind of points system for determining places” – Adrian Riley.

Not humorous but I need to get this off my chest so maybe you’ll consider inclusion [make your own jokes here – Football Daily Ed]. Why are the Championship’s televised fixtures so inconsiderate of away fans? Ipswich host Sheffield United at 8pm on Friday, leaving Blades fans with a trip home from Suffolk after 10pm. Tomorrow, Charlton v Millwall is at 12.30pm – wouldn’t it be kinder to have played these games the other way round? I know it’s all about the money, but travelling supporters are a key part of the atmosphere, would it really hurt to treat them with a little more respect?” – Glynn Marshall.

One of my ‘favourite’ things about Football Daily are the verb choices for quotes in the News, Bits and Bobs section [full email edition]. Over the last year, I’ve been keeping a tally to determine the most frequent selections. At the top of the table, with 63 uses, we have ‘roared,’ edging out ‘cheered,’ which finished on 57. ‘Sighed’, ‘sniffed’, ‘tooted’ and ‘whooped’ will have to battle it out in the playoffs. Among the more colourful one-off entries for the last year: ‘Shizzled,’ ‘rhapsodised,’ ‘Redknapped’ and ‘Aretha Franklin-ed’. Keep up the ‘good’ work” – Chad Thomas.

I just saw footage of Romario, actually 59, still nutmegging opponents and scoring goals à la Dennis Bergkamp v Newcastle. He’s a free agent and I believe Chelsea are still looking for a striker” – Yannick Woustra.

This is an extract from our daily football email … Football Daily. To get the full version, just visit this page and follow the instructions.

Plus: more First Division players from unusual places, and the first team with a star on their shirt

• Mail us with your questions and answers

“In their Conference League game away to Legia Warsaw, Hibernian wore parts of all three of this season’s kits – third shirt, away shorts and home socks,” noted Euan Williamson last week. “Has any other team done this before?”

As mixed kits go, the ensemble worn by Hibs in Poland – black shirt, green shorts and green socks – looked good. Hibs, who had lost the first 2-1 at Easter Road, came within seconds of a famous triumph before eventually losing in extra-time.

Any more examples? Email us here…

Max Rushden is joined by Barry Glendenning, Dan Bardell and Ali Maxwell to discuss all the latest World Cup qualifying action

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On the podcast today: another England qualifier, another low block they labour to break down – this time from Andorra. The panel ask, does it always have to be like this? Thomas Tuchel’s England side are yet to be good, so how long do fans have to wait for it to click?